How to learn to forgive

  • Italiano
Antonio Interguglielmi

Jesus came among us because we all could receive from him this gift of God, just as the debtor in the parable of the Gospel today, who asks to his master to remit his debt, an astronomical amount. How beautiful it is to receive this forgiveness, the forgiveness of God who does not look at the size of our debt: this experience changes us interiorly, gives us an immense joy, we feel a profound liberation.

But we can also be like this debtor that in front of the gift received, hardens his heart with its debtors and does not show mercy like his master.

Perhaps he did not understand the greatness of the gift received, or has already forgotten it and he is not capable of returning the gift, in a much smaller way. Even we however, often face our inability to forgive: how can I accept the injustices at work, the betrayals, the falsity, the offenses, those speaking ill of me? As far as we strive we do not succeed! Perhaps we might be able not to take revenge … but forgive, do good to my persecutors… not that!

Thus, it seems that Jesus asks us something impossible, gives us a burden that we cannot bear. But this is not the case, because the Gospel always gives us a message of freedom, Christ frees us from the burdens of life, he does not give us more. He knows that our call, our happiness, is to live in communion: Owe no one anything, except to love one another; for he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law”, St Paul writes in the letter to the Romans (13.8).

The will of God for us is the “communion”: For this He will help you, He will give you the Spirit to do what you alone under no circumstances will be able to do.

Forgiveness, is not our work, but it is a gift of God. It is not in our capacity, we can’t do it alone. The desire to forgive is born from the experience of the forgiveness that we receive, always when we ask it repentant, to the Lord: a forgiveness without limits, without conditions, with a trust that sometimes scandalizes us, because we do not have it even with ourselves.

How many weddings, how many friends or family relationships could be saved knowing this gift: what unites a married couple is not the fact of not making mistakes ever, but knowing how to recognize one owns errors and that for this we need Christ, because without Him we cannot forgive nor ask forgiveness, we cannot go ahead.

Making the experience of forgiveness recreates us in deep: being able to forgive, gives us a peace that cannot be compared to anything, because it is a seed of “Eternal life”.

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