The answer to every possible marital crisis passes from the bedroom. Thanks to sex the couple is strengthened, learns mutual respect, finds again harmony and prepares to face (in full communion) every aspect of married life. This is what is asserted by a study conducted by researchers of the University of York, Lausanne and Fribourg, and reported by the Daily Mail, who monitored the sexual life of 50 couples. The result? The duration of a relationship is directly proportional to the amount of intercourses consummated. To this we shall add what has been repeatedly stressed by many American sexologists, according to whom making love not only strengthens the feeling but ensures its longevity, drastically reducing cases of infidelity.
“Sex makes more happy – explains Dr. Amanda Pasciucco, therapist of the family and of marriage – because frees endorphins increasing the levels of dopamine and oxytocin in the brain”. The intimacy, in particular, “brings the partners closer. It is the best way to create complicity. Especially if preceded and followed by a dialog”. This harmony translates into a better relationship in everyday life, influencing in a decisive manner the prospects of a lasting sentimental relationship, not only in the days immediately following the intercourse but even in the 6 months following.
For Dr. Roger Libby, author and sex therapist, “making love is healthy and essential, is the glue of a couple relationship “. While Micheal Dawn underlines the importance, during the act, to maintain eye contact and holding hands. Because sexuality should never be as an end unto itself – finalized only to physical pleasure – but must be first of all an expression of mutual feelings. “If a person feels rejected or wounded – he highlights – closes. When partners reach a good level of intimacy instead, they tend to open, to confront“. The feeling of being desired “generates wellness and desire of sharing”. For the therapist Jacqueline Mendez, the intercourse is a sort of “time machine”: takes back the couple to the first moments of their love relationship”. Thanks to the intimacy the spouses “support each other, even if they do not agree. Theirs love is unconditional, and strengthens the parenting if they have children”. Vice versa not making love affects the personal life, including the one outside home. “Many men argue that abstinence damages their workday because they know that, once returned between the domestic walls they will be rejected. The women, instead, feel affected in their self-esteem“.
Fight the decline of desire
Sexuality is therefore a central aspect of married life. And in order to avoid dangerous obstacles it is necessary that each one does his/her part. The risk is that the dynamics of daily life and the routine, end up with prevail leading to loss of desire. This is a disorder of the intimate sphere that reduces the frequency of intercourse, provoking discontent and frustration within the couple. Beyond the cases in which the disorder is caused by organic diseases (for which it is appropriate to contact a specialist), most experts recommend to reconstruct the harmony starting by dialoguing and sharing, including the problems that may have determined the affective crisis. To resume together a difficult but exciting path, intended to last for the lifetime.